The Hidden Cost of Avoiding Politics: Why You're More Anxious Than Ever
Escaping the news and political conversations feels like self-care, but it actually makes stress worse. Here’s how to break free.
Are you an avoider when it comes to political stress?
Do you turn off the news whenever Trump's face is on the screen? Do you unfollow or mute people on social media because their political posts spark outrage? Do you avoid political conversations at family gatherings because they stress you out? If so, you're not alone.
A growing number of Americans are avoiding politics:
70% avoid political conversations with people they disagree with
45% have stopped discussing politics with someone because of something they said
But here’s what everyone misses: The more you avoid political stress, the more stressed politics makes you.
The Hidden Problem with Avoidance
Avoidance feels like self-care. In reality, it’s a maladaptive coping strategy that trains your brain to become more distressed, not less.
Think about someone who is afraid of spiders. The more they avoid them, the scarier they seem. Their brain learns, "Avoidance keeps me safe." So, whenever they see a spider, their fear response strengthens.
The same cycle happens with political stress:
You avoid political news ➔ instant relief
Your brain reinforces the idea that politics = danger
Next time you see political content, your stress is even worse
This isn’t just a psychological theory—it’s neuroscience. Avoidance makes the amygdala (the brain’s fear center) more reactive, while weakening the prefrontal cortex (responsible for emotional regulation).
The result? Politics feels even more overwhelming when you inevitably encounter it.
My Story
After the 2016 election, I stopped watching the news, listening to NPR, and reading the New York Times. I withdrew from political conversations, especially with people I disagreed with. At first, it felt like self-care—but over time, my pain grew worse. I couldn’t hide from everything. Whenever a news story broke through, it felt like a physical assault. Every time I heard a journalist say, “President-Elect Donald Trump,” I felt like vomiting.
As a psychiatrist, I knew there was only one solution for my growing distress: desensitization. I started with small doses of political news, then gradually increased my exposure. Slowly, my emotional reaction mellowed. Once I could read the news, I listened to Trump’s press conferences and speeches. Once his speeches no longer upset me, I began talking with Trump voters online.
Eventually, politics no longer felt excruciating and unbearable but became something I could engage with calmly and rationally.
This process—gradual desensitization—can work for you, too.
Avoidance vs. Healthy Boundaries
Before we dive into how desensitization works, let’s discuss an area where there’s a lot of confusion: the difference between avoiding politics and setting healthy boundaries.
Avoidance and boundary-setting might look and sound similar, but they work in opposite ways:
Avoidance = Escaping discomfort. It reinforces fear and makes politics feel more significant and frightening.
Boundaries = Controlling when and how you engage. It builds emotional strength and keeps you informed without overwhelming you.
To learn how to set healthy boundaries, see my article from February:
To figure out whether you are avoiding or setting healthy boundaries, ask yourself:
Do I step away from political content because I need a break, or because I feel emotionally incapable of handling it?
Does political content make me feel paralyzed, enraged, or completely out of control?
When I do engage with political content, do I feel more frightened than before?
If political content and engagement make you feel powerless and emotionally flooded, it’s likely a sign you need more structured exposure, not less.
The Science of Desensitization and Habituation
You can break the cycle of avoidance. The brain adapts remarkably well, and by using desensitization, you can train it to handle political stress in controlled doses. This same technique helps people overcome phobias, PTSD, and anxiety disorders through exposure therapy.
How Desensitization Works
A stressor (like the news) initially triggers a strong emotional reaction.
With repeated, controlled exposure, the brain gradually reduces its response.
Over time, political content feels less overwhelming.
This process, called habituation, weakens your brain’s emotional reaction through repeated exposure. But success depends on gradual, structured exposure—not diving headfirst into overwhelming content.
One of the best ways to break the avoidance cycle is with a desensitization step ladder, also known as an exposure hierarchy. This tool helps you systematically increase your exposure to distressful political content, starting with the least stressful and progressively working up to more challenging material. By taking it step by step, your brain naturally builds tolerance, making it easier to stay informed and engaged without feeling overwhelmed.
Will Desensitization Make You Numb to Politics? No—It’ll Make You More Powerful.
Some people worry that becoming less reactive to political stress will make them care less or lose their passion for change. But the truth is the exact opposite.
Desensitization doesn’t weaken your commitment—it sharpens your strategy. When you can face political stress without emotional overload, you become a stronger advocate, a clearer thinker, and a more powerful force for change.
Think of a firefighter running into a burning building. They don’t freeze up in panic. They don’t let adrenaline take over. They’ve trained themselves to stay calm under pressure—not because they don’t care, but because their ability to stay focused saves lives.
The same applies to political engagement. If every headline, debate, or social media post sends you spiraling into anger or despair, you’re not in control—your emotions are. But when you train yourself to stay steady, you become unstoppable.
How to Build Your Own Desensitization Step Ladder
Want to train your brain to stay calm under political stress? Follow this step-by-step process to systematically reduce your emotional reactivity.
Step 1: Identify Your Triggers
Which political figures, topics, or events send your emotions into overdrive? What specific news stories, social media posts, or conversations spike your anxiety, outrage, or hopelessness? Write down every trigger you can think of, big or small.
Step 2: Rank Your Triggers from Least to Most Stressful
This ranking becomes your desensitization step ladder—a structured way to ease yourself into handling stress-inducing content with greater emotional control. The idea is to start with challenging but bearable political triggers and work your way up to much more daunting stimuli over time as your brain acclimates.
Step 3: Learn Your Calm-Down Tools
Before you start exposing yourself to these triggers, equip yourself with coping strategies like deep breathing, grounding, or cognitive interventions. These tools can help you calm down while you are actively exposing yourself to a trigger. The articles below can get you started:
Step 4: Begin Gradual Exposure
Start with the least distressing trigger. Observe your physical and emotional reactions while using your calm-down tools to stay centered. Keep with it until the stimulus no longer provokes a strong response, then move to the next step.
Step 5: Progress at a Sustainable Pace
Political desensitization is not a race. Depending on your nervous system and past experiences, it might take days, weeks, or even months to build full emotional tolerance. Slow and steady progress will create lasting resilience.
Step Ladder Example: Train Your Brain to Tolerate Trump
A lot of people are dangerously triggered by Donald Trump. Here’s a desensitization step ladder that someone might use to become less reactive to the president.:
Step 1: Look at a photo of Trump
Step 2: Read a newspaper article about Trump
Step 3: Watch a White House press conference
Step 4: Listen to a Trump speech
Step 5: Watch a Trump speech
This is a five-step ladder. You might need a lot more steps to get from looking at a photo of Trump to watching a Trump speech. That’s okay. The goal isn’t to build a ladder that can get you to the top fast, but to create one that you can and will actually climb.
Systematic, Gradual Exposure Is Key
If exposure works so well, why doesn’t endlessly watching the news desensitize us? After all, Trump is seemingly everywhere, yet many people still feel instantly triggered by his voice or face. The answer can be found in the way our brain processes potential threats.
Your brain prioritizes danger. When exposed to something it perceives as a threat, it triggers a stress response, keeping you hyper-alert and anxious. That’s why many people feel drained, not more informed, after a news binge.
In contrast, structured, controlled exposure—the kind I’m advocating—teaches the brain to adapt. Instead of overwhelming yourself with a flood of political content, you introduce it in small, manageable doses, allowing your brain to habituate and reduce its stress response over time.
Final Thoughts
Avoiding politics often feels like a form of self-care, but it can reinforce distress instead of reducing it.
If you find yourself spinning out when you see Trump’s face, see the day’s news, or hear someone express support for MAGA, chances are you could benefit from desensitization.
I won’t lie—building this kind of desensitization takes effort. It’s neither quick nor pleasant, but the payoff is worth it.
In addition to lowering your daily political stress, desensitization will help you:
Stay in difficult conversations longer.
Listen to opposing views without getting defensive.
Process bad news without spiraling into despair.
Make decisions based on reason and evidence, not knee-jerk emotions.
Sustain activism and advocacy work without burning out.
Don’t let political stress control you—start your desensitization journey today and regain your peace of mind.
Question: On a scale from 1 to 10, how triggered are you by political news, people, and conversations?
Which triggers are hardest for you? Why?
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Great points are made regarding self-care and boundaries versus avoidance. I do not want seething anger, but small amounts get me moving and engaged. When conversing with another person, that is differently minded, I don’t want any anger so I can clearly listen and make sure the person feels heard. Following Karin’s ideas during election time really worked if the other person had the time to stay and talk with me.
OK, wow, thank you for this. I'm realizing that I really need to try this.