Five Things We Won’t Ask You to Do
Mapping out the negative spaces of our positive work
Last week I shared my three-sided “Elevator Pitch” for why Smart Politics’ respectful and empathetic approach to persuading Trump voters through conversation is more effective at slowing or stopping Trump and Musk’s actions, but to also builds a longer-term progressive legislative and cultural future.
And I’m just sure that my beautiful three-pitch was so perfect, so persuasive that no human who read it could possibly ever object to our goals and methods. Right? Right?!
Okay, to be honest, we do occasionally receive some pushback or at least concerned questions about the Smart Politics philosophy and process. So, let’s talk through a few of them.
1) Are we expected to have conversations with people who claim to hate or even want to hurt us?
No. Smart Politics welcomes anyone from any demographic or background to practice this work. But we’d never ask anyone to do anything that puts them at emotional or physical risk, especially if they’re part of a historically marginalized or oppressed group. That’s a call each individual makes, and we respect anyone’s choice to put their personal safety first.
While Smart Politics is for everyone, much of this work is done by allies leveraging their privilege in peer-to-peer conversations. This is both because people are more likely to be influenced by those who are like them and because the less privileged of the world have enough to worry about without also having to persuade people of higher privilege that systemic oppression exists and should stop.
That said, two things to keep in mind:
a) Having conversations with Trump voters can sometimes be uncomfortable. In that, we could all use a little gentle, nuanced nudging and support to (safely) move a bit outside our comfort zone. After all, any important effort pushes ourselves to grow and expand our skills, experiences, and deepen our tolerance for being a little uncomfortable.
b) When we talk to them face to face, one on one, away from the crowd, most Trump voters are not the loud, obnoxious, threatening caricatures we may have conjured in our minds based on social media and worst-of-the-worst reporting from Trump rallies. It’s understandable to be nervous or afraid based on the image of them we built up in our minds, but when we sit down and talk with the average Trump voters, we usually find them to be much kinder or at least more polite than we expected.
So yes, always protect yourself, but if you can find an opportunity to safely talk with someone, you may find you’re stronger than you think, and they aren’t as bad as you feared.
2) But isn’t talking with Trump voters emotional labor we shouldn’t have to do? After all, they aren’t making a good-faith effort to talk with us!
I usually frame Smart Politics as “work,” because it is—it’s not always easy and can require a lot of preparation and practice. In fact, any activism requires our labor, our time and energy, whether it’s marching, protesting, writing letters, making calls, etc. But Smart Politics also requires an emotional labor many of us aren’t used to or comfortable with… yet: being the “bigger person” in a conversation and showing patience and empathy even when others aren’t.
We believe being kind and compassionate with someone gives them permission and encouragement to return it in kind, so to speak. But that may not always happen right away—they may be defensive and honestly afraid of you and what you think of them or might say about them, and so they may lash out or resist. Giving them time and space to lower their defenses requires strength to weather the storm thrown at us (or at least a litany of right-wing media talking points and misinformation).
Karin has written in the past about how to tame trolls. The same approach works when talking to anyone who’s being belligerent or defensive:
This work asks us to take the lead, set the example and tone, and often do a lot of heavy lifting in the conversation. That’s not easy when our own fears and emotions are running rampant. But if we prepare ourselves and practice working past initial pushback, we can break through and build something useful and important with them.
3) Does having conversations mean capitulating, surrendering our progressive values, or having to support policies and beliefs we oppose?
Absolutely not. Smart Politics is about progressives more effectively promoting progressive ideas, and we can meet people where they are and find common ground and shared values without sacrificing our ideals. Do democracy and politics often require compromise? Of course—none of us are ever going to get everything we want or find perfect people or a perfect policy solution. But we can be realistic and pragmatic about our goals and progress without compromising our values.
Does talking or working with a racist or fascist to find shared (non-racist, non-fascist) goals and values make you part racist or fascist? Of course not. We’re not going over to their side or horse-trading our values away—we’re looking for a middle place we can meet and work from.
Finding common ground is a process of discovery not surrender, and improved communication with the other side doesn’t erode our commitment to our beliefs.
4) How can we do this work when we’re so scared and angry with Trump and Musk and the GOP leadership?
Managing and redirecting our own emotional energy is a huge first step in this work, and we spend a lot of time teaching and supporting it.
Check out Karin’s recent pieces about the futility of panic:
But we also encourage talking with Trump voters because it helps us understand they aren’t monolithic: there are many different voters with different reasons for their votes. We often fall into an attribution error, taking the loudest, most grotesque, hateful, infuriating, attention-seeking postures and noise we see on TV and social media and applying them down to the average American who voted for Trump last fall.
In reality, you’re unlikely to be talking one-on-one with Trump, Musk, Vance, GOP politicians, or right-wing pundits. Instead, you’re going to be talking to a family member or a friend; someone with whom you may have a long history of life experiences and emotional connections with far outside the realm of divisive politics. Don’t assume you know the reasons they voted for Trump, just ask them (sincerely) why, and you’ll likely find they did so for a variety of reasons that don’t neatly line up with those assumptions.
Plus, to bring it full circle, just having these conversations can also lower our own emotional reactance and help us manage our own fear and anger.
5) There’s no point in trying to talk with Trump voters—after a third election, they’re too uninformed, misinformed, and too far gone in the cult.
Despite what it may feel sometimes, nearly all people can—and often do—change their minds in large and small ways. Just take a moment to think about all the things you or your loved ones have changed perspectives on over the years. Evolution of opinions can be tricky and often frustratingly slow, but it absolutely does happen.
As for “informed vs. uninformed,” yes, we may have different backgrounds, different education and skills, different interests and priorities, and especially different levels of engagement with and awareness of politics and political issues and news. But Smart Politics conversations aren’t about attacking each other to find differences and weaknesses in their arguments and facts—they’re about searching for areas and values we can agree on and working from there.
When given respect and compassion, along with space and patience, anyone can change their own minds on almost any issue. Maybe we don’t convert them all to progressives or to vote Democrat, but at the very least, talking with others can lower some of that polarization and negative partisanship. Smart Politics doesn’t look at Trump voters and say, “What are they wrong about?” but rather, “Where can we start together?” No one is so far gone they don’t offer us that.
Have concerns or questions about this work I didn’t address? Be sure to let us know in the comments!
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Locke Peterseim is the Smart Politics Content Manager.